So we drove home December 15 feeling pretty low. What happened? Did we hear wrong? What was going on? There was not a booming voice from heaven with an explaination. So we just waited. We didn't really do anything with the adoption for the next few weeks. Christmas and New Years kept us busy!
Then one day, we got an email from our agency. It contained a list of children waiting for a home. There was very little information. Just names, ages, and a sentence or two about the child/group. One group of 3 caught our eye. Honestly, it was because of their ages. So we decided to inquire about them. About a week later, we got a bit more information. A reference card if you will. Containing basic, non-detailed information about each child.....and a picture. Whoa. Cuteness was everywhere! We thought for a while and decided to tell our parents that we were considering these kids. By now it was the middle of January. The snow came and went and Brent's hand had been bothering him greatly for a few weeks.
We decided to send a letter of intent. Our updated dossier was translated and re-submitted. This took about a week. The consejo for January was the last weekend. We were told that our dossier was held up and did not make it to that consejo. We were pretty thankful for that. The doctor scheduled Brent's surgery for the middle of February and recovery was either going to take 1 month or 3 months depending on what he found during the surgery. According to the MRI and the doctor, Brent had DESTROYED all the cartilige in his wrist. He could not even pick up a bottle of water and was in EXTREME pain and had not slept through the night since before Christmas. He usually only got about 2 hours of sleep a night. We were both having a very hard time spiritually and emotionally, Brent physically, we were struggling really bad. In fact, moving to Antartica was very appealing! So if we had been assigned the kids in January, there may not have been enough time for Brent's recovery nor our spiritual/emotional recovery.
So we were ready set for the February consejo. :) We decided not to mention to anyone except our immediate family that we inquired about the 3 siblings. Just wanted to keep it on the down low since the last time it didn't go so well. It was hard when everyone would say, "well how are things going with the adoption?" My usual response was that we were just waiting. Which was true, we just didn't specify that we were waiting on a certain 3 kids.
My birthday came - I am now 30! Wierd! Brent's surgery was the next day after my birthday. That was the best day. Ever. He was instantly out of pain (except for normal surgery soreness) and he has slept through the night since the 2nd night! PRAISE THE LORD!! Also the Sunday before our pastor preached on Psalm 55. It was great. In the Psalm, David says he wants to have wings like a dove so he can fly away. Funny - so did we! Then at the end David still places his trust in the Lord, even though his own son is trying to kill him. God used that in our lives. Hope was reborn!
This brings us to present day! Sunday came and we told our Sunday school class - hey we might get kids Wednesday. So we had a few more prayer warriors with us. Then Wednesday came, the day of the consejo. I was off from work and headed to the doctor. Wow. I didn't even know what to pray. The only thing that kept coming to mind was "Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." There were 2 other families in our agency who had requested children and Peru does not like to show favortism by giving children to more than one family in the same agency. So we knew there was a possibilty that we would not get placed with the children this time around. Then Brent got an email around noon saying it was very possible that we were getting them. Then at 4:55, I got a phone call. It was not my area code, so I debated on whether or not to answer it - could have been a wrong number and I have our agencies in my phone and their name was not popping up - but I answered. It was P from our agency! What?! She had just gotten a call from her daughter! Peru had just posted everything on the site! It was offical! We had the 3 kids. They never post anything early - it's usually the next day. P said she and her daughter usually have a race to see who can check the site first the day after the consejo. Wow! Amazing! I called Brent.
We had to print off our acceptance letter. So we also printed the picture we had a few times and after church headed off to our parents to show them the picture of their new grandchildren!
I emailed P today, just to make sure it was till official and that they had not changed their minds. It's official! We got the docutments today.
We are so excited. We don't have a clue what to do next. The next few months are going to be a whirlwind I think. Thank You Lord!
"Tonight’s the night......Two worlds collide in a beautiful display
It’s all up tonight
When we step across the line.......We can sail across the sea"
Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers
2.24.2011
2.23.2011
A story for you while you wait.....
My friend Sharon and I have been chatting a bit the past couple of days. She and Tim are adopting from Ethiopa. They will be adopting 2 for sure. We both realized that it takes a while to get where you are going in adopting. You can read about her experience here.
But here is ours:
When Brent and I started all this it was 2008. We were getting ready to leave seminary and staying with some friend for a couple of weeks. They were also considering adopting. An adoption camp from the Ukraine was passing through the church we attended. We also found out that Brent's mentor and his wife were starting to adopt from Nepal. It's so neat how God puts you on the same road with other people, even before you know that you are going on that road! Brent finally told me that during his time with God he was really being impressed upon to start adopting. I was just waiting on him to tell me. I had been praying for a few weeks about it myself. But I did not want to tell Brent and then have him just agree with me. It needed to come from the Lord.
We arrive here in August and I called the pregnancy center that I volunteered at for some months years ago to ask if they knew of any adoption agencies. I only knew of one and their office was in Texas.
They pointed us to Lifeline. We made an appointment to meet with a domestic social worker and an international social worker, just see what all this adoption stuff was about. :) I can't really remember anything about the meeting. I guess I knew this was where we were going and we just had to figure out a place. At the time Lifeline only worked with about 5 countries. We weren't old enough for China, the Ukraine wasn't for us, Guatemala is closed, so there were just 2 left. Should we go with a different agency with more countries? I asked Brent if he could adopt from anywhere in the world where would it be? His answer: Brazil. Brent has been to several South American countries and Mexico several times. So we landed in Peru. It was the only South American country that had a contract with Lifeline.
We finally mailed in our application in May of 2009. A social worker called me the next day and we talked about a few things on the application. A few weeks later talking with the social worker for Peru, we thought there were some red flags and maybe we should consider a different route.
Enter the domestic portion of our adoption.
We began our home study meetings in August of 2009 with Renee. We loved our domestic social worker, she is a fabulous social worker. But Peru would not leave us alone. October came and we were headed to Lifeline for the last meeting for the home study. We made it through the last of the normal home study meeting and took break. Next we were to begin discussing the information that was just for domestic adoptions. After the break, we took a deep breath and told our social worker that we really needed to switch back to Peru. Whewww! That was actually more nerve-wracking than you would think! But you must understand, we felt very wishy-washy. We had just switched from Peru to domestic and now we were changing back? What was going on with us! But our social worker was incredibly understanding. She even told us that through-out our whole home study with her, she thought there was just something not quite right.
Enter the Peru home study. We pretty much did our entire home study again, only this time with our Peru social worker! We worked with her from October 2009 to March 2010. Unfortuantely, we did not really click very well with her nor the director of the program. We usually left very discouraged from the meetings with them. So we made the decision to switch agency and we have a new placing agency. We instantly fit with them! It was great. They helped make the switch and getting documents sent over very easy and understood what was going on. They have also had a Peru program for 23 years! They helped us with our dossier documents.
After all the switching around our dossier finally made it to Peru in August 2010! A few weeks later an email came to our inbox with the information of 4 siblings needing a home. I sent the email to Brent as a joke asking him if he wanted 4 kids. He took me seriously! So we pondered and talked and emailed our agency telling them yes, we would take them. Our agency was very excited. I thought they would tell us we were crazy, but they went to work, emailing the lawyer in Peru and getting information.
But we discovered that we were too young. In Peru, you must be 18 years older than the oldest child you adopt. In our case, we would have only been 16 years older than the oldest child. We were totally okay with this information and went on about our business.
Fast forward to November 2010, another email hits my inbox. This time Peru is telling us that if we still wanted to adopt these 4 kids we could. WHAT!?!?! This is crazy! Wow! So for some weeks, we thought and prayed and thought and prayed and discussed this idea with our parents and some other families who adopted 4 or 5 siblings at one time. We made the decision to go ahead. Our letter of intent was submitted on December 1. That same night we received a phone call from someone saying they wanted to make a donation to our adoption fund. Another person set up a page with information for our friends to give to our fund as well. We thought, "surely this is the Lord blessing this decision! We are headed in the right direction."
With updating the home study for 4 kids, we also had to have a new psych evaluation (i think to make sure we really weren't crazy! haha!) We drove down on December 15 to meet with the psychologist. The meeting went well. She asked for pictures when we got the kids and we walked across the hall to our agency where they told us an email was sent to them from Peru that morning saying our letter of intent was rejected and we could not have the kids. I really didn't understand was she meant when she told us. I thought okay, so we just submit it again. Then she said it again and I realized - "oh, we can't have them at all. Okay. Well now what?"
Too be continued........
But here is ours:
When Brent and I started all this it was 2008. We were getting ready to leave seminary and staying with some friend for a couple of weeks. They were also considering adopting. An adoption camp from the Ukraine was passing through the church we attended. We also found out that Brent's mentor and his wife were starting to adopt from Nepal. It's so neat how God puts you on the same road with other people, even before you know that you are going on that road! Brent finally told me that during his time with God he was really being impressed upon to start adopting. I was just waiting on him to tell me. I had been praying for a few weeks about it myself. But I did not want to tell Brent and then have him just agree with me. It needed to come from the Lord.
We arrive here in August and I called the pregnancy center that I volunteered at for some months years ago to ask if they knew of any adoption agencies. I only knew of one and their office was in Texas.
They pointed us to Lifeline. We made an appointment to meet with a domestic social worker and an international social worker, just see what all this adoption stuff was about. :) I can't really remember anything about the meeting. I guess I knew this was where we were going and we just had to figure out a place. At the time Lifeline only worked with about 5 countries. We weren't old enough for China, the Ukraine wasn't for us, Guatemala is closed, so there were just 2 left. Should we go with a different agency with more countries? I asked Brent if he could adopt from anywhere in the world where would it be? His answer: Brazil. Brent has been to several South American countries and Mexico several times. So we landed in Peru. It was the only South American country that had a contract with Lifeline.
We finally mailed in our application in May of 2009. A social worker called me the next day and we talked about a few things on the application. A few weeks later talking with the social worker for Peru, we thought there were some red flags and maybe we should consider a different route.
Enter the domestic portion of our adoption.
We began our home study meetings in August of 2009 with Renee. We loved our domestic social worker, she is a fabulous social worker. But Peru would not leave us alone. October came and we were headed to Lifeline for the last meeting for the home study. We made it through the last of the normal home study meeting and took break. Next we were to begin discussing the information that was just for domestic adoptions. After the break, we took a deep breath and told our social worker that we really needed to switch back to Peru. Whewww! That was actually more nerve-wracking than you would think! But you must understand, we felt very wishy-washy. We had just switched from Peru to domestic and now we were changing back? What was going on with us! But our social worker was incredibly understanding. She even told us that through-out our whole home study with her, she thought there was just something not quite right.
Enter the Peru home study. We pretty much did our entire home study again, only this time with our Peru social worker! We worked with her from October 2009 to March 2010. Unfortuantely, we did not really click very well with her nor the director of the program. We usually left very discouraged from the meetings with them. So we made the decision to switch agency and we have a new placing agency. We instantly fit with them! It was great. They helped make the switch and getting documents sent over very easy and understood what was going on. They have also had a Peru program for 23 years! They helped us with our dossier documents.
After all the switching around our dossier finally made it to Peru in August 2010! A few weeks later an email came to our inbox with the information of 4 siblings needing a home. I sent the email to Brent as a joke asking him if he wanted 4 kids. He took me seriously! So we pondered and talked and emailed our agency telling them yes, we would take them. Our agency was very excited. I thought they would tell us we were crazy, but they went to work, emailing the lawyer in Peru and getting information.
But we discovered that we were too young. In Peru, you must be 18 years older than the oldest child you adopt. In our case, we would have only been 16 years older than the oldest child. We were totally okay with this information and went on about our business.
Fast forward to November 2010, another email hits my inbox. This time Peru is telling us that if we still wanted to adopt these 4 kids we could. WHAT!?!?! This is crazy! Wow! So for some weeks, we thought and prayed and thought and prayed and discussed this idea with our parents and some other families who adopted 4 or 5 siblings at one time. We made the decision to go ahead. Our letter of intent was submitted on December 1. That same night we received a phone call from someone saying they wanted to make a donation to our adoption fund. Another person set up a page with information for our friends to give to our fund as well. We thought, "surely this is the Lord blessing this decision! We are headed in the right direction."
With updating the home study for 4 kids, we also had to have a new psych evaluation (i think to make sure we really weren't crazy! haha!) We drove down on December 15 to meet with the psychologist. The meeting went well. She asked for pictures when we got the kids and we walked across the hall to our agency where they told us an email was sent to them from Peru that morning saying our letter of intent was rejected and we could not have the kids. I really didn't understand was she meant when she told us. I thought okay, so we just submit it again. Then she said it again and I realized - "oh, we can't have them at all. Okay. Well now what?"
Too be continued........
2.22.2011
OH. MY. WORD.
So tomorrow is the consejo. Oh. my. word. We could have kids. WHAT!?!?!?! This reality hasn't hit me until now. My heart is pounding with excitement! Calm Down! :) The crazy thing about adoption is that you totally have to trust the Lord. There is absolutley no control over anything. So....I'll let you know soon. =)
Psalm 46:10.
Psalm 46:10.
2.19.2011
2.09.2011
I know how she feels.....
So...I may have written this before, but I can't remember.
Sometimes it seems like we are not really adopting. Almost as if one day we will jump out from the behind the curtain and shout "surprise! Just kidding!" Especially during this time of waiting. We are waiting on an email or a phone call for our referrel(s).
But mostly I feel unequipped for this task. We have several friends who are adopting or have completed their adoption, but they all live in different states. So sometimes I feel alone on this journey. Brent and I will be first time parents, most of our friends who have adopted were already parents, so Brent and I are going brand-spankin' new to this whole new world of parenting. Granted, sometimes I feel like we have 40 kids with our youth at the church. But we send these kids home!
We are not able to talk much with our out-of-state friends, so I don't know how they feel or their emotions.
So, it leaves me wondering - isn't this adoption thing for real adults who have their ducks in a row and don't have to wonder if they can make it on one salary? Do they have to fund-raise and then run out of ideas and people or does the money just appear on their doorstep? Do they have an adoption support group and resources available all over their city or not?
I don't know. I just have to believe. Even if I don't feel it.
My friend Kelly sent me this link to a new blog. I laughed when I read a post from her Big Adoption Series, here is the excerpt:
"I noticed right away that most of the other couples
seemed infinitely more knowledgeable about adoption.
They all looked like real adults - capable, earnest,
not especially given to the whims of fashion or style.
They were sensible and generous in the exact way that
parents, in my mind, should be. I tugged at my cute cardigan,
probably found in the Junior's department, and wished
I hadn't even bothered with make-up. I did my very best
to appear mature and motherly and all the while, I felt
like an impostor. We nodded our way through muddy terminology
dossier, referral, home study. We sat up straight and drank
Sprite from paper cups as we swatted imperceptibly at
nagging thoughts - we are too young, we don't know how
to be parents, who would ever give us a baby? The swinging
seat lurched ever-so-slightly, for the very first time
as we came to understand all that would be required of us,
when all I wanted was to sign a paper and order up my baby."
I know how she feels!
- you can check her blog out: www.flowerpatchfarmgirl.blotspot.com
Sometimes it seems like we are not really adopting. Almost as if one day we will jump out from the behind the curtain and shout "surprise! Just kidding!" Especially during this time of waiting. We are waiting on an email or a phone call for our referrel(s).
But mostly I feel unequipped for this task. We have several friends who are adopting or have completed their adoption, but they all live in different states. So sometimes I feel alone on this journey. Brent and I will be first time parents, most of our friends who have adopted were already parents, so Brent and I are going brand-spankin' new to this whole new world of parenting. Granted, sometimes I feel like we have 40 kids with our youth at the church. But we send these kids home!
We are not able to talk much with our out-of-state friends, so I don't know how they feel or their emotions.
So, it leaves me wondering - isn't this adoption thing for real adults who have their ducks in a row and don't have to wonder if they can make it on one salary? Do they have to fund-raise and then run out of ideas and people or does the money just appear on their doorstep? Do they have an adoption support group and resources available all over their city or not?
I don't know. I just have to believe. Even if I don't feel it.
My friend Kelly sent me this link to a new blog. I laughed when I read a post from her Big Adoption Series, here is the excerpt:
"I noticed right away that most of the other couples
seemed infinitely more knowledgeable about adoption.
They all looked like real adults - capable, earnest,
not especially given to the whims of fashion or style.
They were sensible and generous in the exact way that
parents, in my mind, should be. I tugged at my cute cardigan,
probably found in the Junior's department, and wished
I hadn't even bothered with make-up. I did my very best
to appear mature and motherly and all the while, I felt
like an impostor. We nodded our way through muddy terminology
dossier, referral, home study. We sat up straight and drank
Sprite from paper cups as we swatted imperceptibly at
nagging thoughts - we are too young, we don't know how
to be parents, who would ever give us a baby? The swinging
seat lurched ever-so-slightly, for the very first time
as we came to understand all that would be required of us,
when all I wanted was to sign a paper and order up my baby."
I know how she feels!
- you can check her blog out: www.flowerpatchfarmgirl.blotspot.com
2.03.2011
Adoption and the Bible
"In the process of adoption, an individual assumes parental responsibility for the child of another, as Mordecai adopted his young relative Esther after the death of her parents.
Joseph adoped Jesus to be recognized as his own sone in the eyes of God and man. This gave all legal inheritance rights traceable through Joseph to Jesus - see Matthew 1:1-25 - assigning Him to legal claim to the Davidic throne. Spiritually, we are the children of God by adoption just as Jesus was the child of Joseph by adoption. This process of adoption give to the one adopted full family standing and rights - Romans 8:15-17. This transacation is a divinely authorized, God-blessed, and legally binding means for adding to the family unit and passing on the family inheritance - Galatians 4:5 and Ephesians 1:5.
Though the Bible does not present explicit legal process or rights and responsibilities demanded for adoption, Old Testament examples are found in Esther's adoption by Mordecai - Esther 2:15. Also from Moses' adoption by Pharaoh's daughter - Exodus 2:10 and in addition to the use of the adoption motif in explaining God's relationship to His people Israel - Deuteronomy 14:2. In the New Testament, adoption describes the believer's relationship with the Lord - Galations 4:3-7 and Ephesians 1:1-6.
When an individual accepts Jesus as Savior, the Holy Spirit completes a transaction of adoption of their behalf. The individual becomes God's child and He becomes his/her Abba. As God's adopted child, we will inherit a perfect home with Him and in the meantime we have immediate access to Him for comfort, direction, provision, etc. He adopted us with pleasure and will never revoke our adoption."
(Taken from an excerpt from the Women's Study Bible)
Joseph adoped Jesus to be recognized as his own sone in the eyes of God and man. This gave all legal inheritance rights traceable through Joseph to Jesus - see Matthew 1:1-25 - assigning Him to legal claim to the Davidic throne. Spiritually, we are the children of God by adoption just as Jesus was the child of Joseph by adoption. This process of adoption give to the one adopted full family standing and rights - Romans 8:15-17. This transacation is a divinely authorized, God-blessed, and legally binding means for adding to the family unit and passing on the family inheritance - Galatians 4:5 and Ephesians 1:5.
Though the Bible does not present explicit legal process or rights and responsibilities demanded for adoption, Old Testament examples are found in Esther's adoption by Mordecai - Esther 2:15. Also from Moses' adoption by Pharaoh's daughter - Exodus 2:10 and in addition to the use of the adoption motif in explaining God's relationship to His people Israel - Deuteronomy 14:2. In the New Testament, adoption describes the believer's relationship with the Lord - Galations 4:3-7 and Ephesians 1:1-6.
When an individual accepts Jesus as Savior, the Holy Spirit completes a transaction of adoption of their behalf. The individual becomes God's child and He becomes his/her Abba. As God's adopted child, we will inherit a perfect home with Him and in the meantime we have immediate access to Him for comfort, direction, provision, etc. He adopted us with pleasure and will never revoke our adoption."
(Taken from an excerpt from the Women's Study Bible)
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